I was thinking back on my last breakup and how it took me three years to finally get over him.
Three freaking long years.
Three years I won’t get back. Three years of me thinking about him. Wondering about him. Replaying our relationship over and over. Shooting my shot and sending him a text to see if he’d be open to a conversation.
Well in case you didn’t know — it’s been three years, and we’re still not back together.
Don’t do what I did — get over your ex already and move on.
Yes, sometimes we get hung up on that one person. That one person that is so hard to let go of, no matter what we do. We see things that remind us of them. A random memory creeps in. Someone mentions their name. We dream about them.
I dreamt of my ex vividly on so many occasions. Whether I was awake or asleep — there he was.
While out on a date with someone new, my mind would drift to him. He wasn’t supposed to be there, but sure enough, there he was in my thoughts. I missed him somehow. And his memory was ruining the vibe.
I didn’t have the heart to delete him from my phone, just in case he’d call or text one day. But I didn’t want to see his name on my contact list either; I know, what the hell did I want, right?
So I’d changed his contact name to No — — hoping it would reaffirm my subconscious mind that he was definitely a No.
It didn’t work. My heart still said yes.
Please do yourself a favor and just delete the person from your phone. Unless you want to torture yourself as I did.
I wish moving on from someone was quick, easy, and painless, but the truth is they leave a lasting imprint in our lives. They shape us, change us, and mold us in some way or another.
They were once important, they mattered, and so letting them go should matter too. But don’t delay your healing process by staying on the merry-go-round of denial and empty wishes.
I’m a big advocate for change and moving on, but I’m also a wimp at doing it courageously. It should be rip off the bandaid and just get on with it. I’m more of the let’s pull it off gently, even though it hurts more, I’d rather feel the slow, burning pain.
If it’s any consolation, know this — — you can appreciate someone for who they were and wish them well as they exit your life. Maybe that will help you let them go, maybe it won’t, but you have to accept that it’s over if you want life to go on.
Sometimes two people aren’t meant to stay together. They served their purpose. Taught us a lesson. Helped us grow. Or maybe there’s no deeper meaning other than it was fun while it lasted, now onto the next.
Allowing yourself to accept the end will help you embrace the new beginning. Imagine this — you have yet to meet everyone you’re meant to love and everyone that is meant to love you back.
You have yet to meet them…
Out of the millions of people in this world — and you’re still hung up on just that one? I know, looks who’s talking right. Three years — it took me three years to get over him.
But the point is, be brave enough to finally let them go and be daring enough to accept what’s next on your journey. Maybe it’s a soulful time of being single and embracing solitude. Maybe your soulmate is right around the corner. But you’re blocking them because you’re still hung up on that one person that’s not going to come back around.
Maybe that person is named No on your phone.
Wipe the slate clean and be ready for someone new. Wish your ex well, or don’t, but be clear about your intentions on what you want. And what you want is a freaking amazing life full of joy, hope, love, and the excitement of a new chapter.
You’ve got better things on the horizon, my love. So what are you waiting for?
Get over your ex already. Be happy for what it was but be more excited for what will be.
