The major underlying factors that prompt people of the opposite sex to settle on each other, comes along with whole package in a basket.
A random sampling to unearth people’s real reason for opting for each other will reveal funny conclusions to the surprise of many.
I posed this question to an unmarried self made man, and he paused then said, “why not”.
Status and Stature may seem to be compatriots but are comparatively diametrical to each other in meaning.
STATUS is simply, a person’s condition, legal position or standing, relative to that of others-prestige or high standing.
STATURE on the other hand, signifies a person’s height, the amount of public respect or popularity as gathered through achievements and developmental endeavors.
So the question as posed is, “Does it matter”? Ogyam, please answer yourself! As the above definition depicts, public respect and fame as gathered, is substantially achieved through judicious expatiation of one’s duty functions.
One may be a CEO of a bank, a football Club, an organization, of a country, a Pastor or an MP. Respect gathered, the fame and honor alluded to oneself is determined by what one does with the height and AT THE HEIGHT.
Narrowing it down to our main drama on the table, here he is, a young successful CEO being coaxed by parents and relatives to shun those flamboyant city girls and pretentious church bells and go for a village girl.
It is easier said than done. Is village girl not a woman?
Akosua Dubai (nicknamed after her familiarity with Dubai) is a young single beautiful businesswoman who shuttles between Accra and Dubai and merchandised in all manner of goods including costumes and cosmetics.
Fortunately, Akosua Dubai is perfectly in agreement with herself, parents and close relatives to settle down as a family woman. Her level of affluence, the exposure to the world and cash, had unreservedly put her in an enviable position that she can single-handedly sponsor anything that surfaces in her home (nuclear or extended).
Albeit that, the irony of the situation is that the guys are not showing up. Her level of financial stature is probably creating an unseen wall around her, making it extremely difficult for guys to propose to her. Why should it be so?
As a normal niche carved for oneself, a businesswoman who is single and deals in costumes would be a spectacle to watch and is best described that told. There is a cloud of OPULENCE and NEXUS of like manners coming to play.
As I speak, someone reading through this stuff is pitiably saturated with tears because I have opened a semblance of Pandora box in his/her life.
Should she stoop so low for whoever comes around out of desperation and family pressure and settle down, or which way now?
Stature is built out of what one does (positive or negative), and conscientiously, choosing a lifetime partner to suit one’s stature or social standing is a very difficult thing to do owing to the fact that it involved psychological conditioning of both minds against possible noises that may occur.
Are you doing it as response to church or family demand?
Remember, family or church demands has nothing to do with emotional responses which runs paradox.
“Oh! a Pastor of a glamorous church, your wife is a possible Osofo Maame. Whether you like it or not, you have to go for Sister Araba because, she is been around for years and well endowed with our church liturgy and customs and women’s issues therefore well suited for a Pastor’s wife” on and on they go.
Does that make her compatible to a Pastor’s wife?
A Pastor is an epitome of PULPIT LIFE and exclusivity. Can she be elevated to that standard and expectations? Osofo Maame (as known in our local parlance) isn’t just a title. It is an institution carved around the pulpit with shared responsibility with husband.
Check the following criteria;
* A Pastor’s wife must be educated.
* A Pastor’s wife must be hospitable.
* A Pastor’s wife must be sober.
* A Pastor’s wife mustn’t be quarrelsome.
* A First lady of a Country, or ?
* Be able to Teach and Preach.
As you can see; there are statures or positions that warrant partners compulsively walking synonymous with their partners.
Another example is the French President and his septuagenarian spouse. Culturally, they seemed to be in their own class, but morally and politically, they are unmatched.
The stature of the OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENT must be dignified with a MAN or WOMAN that befits the office in age and mannerism to serve as role model.
Mind you; one can tune or train a person to come to understand the rudiments of one’s occupation and to be by your side or even take over from you when necessary, but changing one’s character (what he/she is cultured of for years) to suit yours is a herculean task that can only be achieved by God.
Significantly, stature or fame isn’t a qualification to quality relationship. It is arguably one of the flavors that leads to peaceful and harmonious marriage life.
It can never be a determining factor traditionally, but biblically and culturally it matters. At the level of a CEO of an organization, going for a certain Esi Atta from Agona Bobikuma (just to satisfy the family and royal lineage) might not be favorable to the main protagonist because Esi Atta, being his JHS mate years back, is a marriageable material though, but lacked the finesse of a higher academic background to match, the modern city dweller’s exposure, peer collaborations and easy integration.
To Be Continued!
Sammy Ladzekpo.
