Why Sex Before Marriage? (Part 1)

This particular intimacy cliche is not a modern day clarion call. It has been an advocacy on the lips of most prominent women and pressure groups as a result of unresolved issues emanating from recent marriages.

The tendency to solicit for sex prior to legitimization of relationship (even amongst probable Christian spouses) is a cloud of mistrust that is lingering on in the minds of many.
People adopt the holier than thou attitude in an attempt to woo a possible lover toward an extended relationship in a pretentious manner.

Marriage being a lifetime engagement, raises a phobia in the minds of possible spouses to be extremely cautious of what they are buying before committing themselves to it in order to avoid any catastrophic regret.

From the angle of women pressure groups and some individuals, their reasons for advocating for sex before marriage (even though it is against religious ethics) sterns from the followings:
1. Assessing the male potency.
2. Assessing the level of strength.
3. Assessing the size of manhood, and
4. Quality Copulation.

Careful analysis of the above concerns are undoubtedly a bothering issue that raise its ugly head after marriages had been celebrated with fanfare, only for one partner to drop a perceived hidden cat out of the bag to the amazement of many.

God in his wisdom commissioned legally married man and woman (husband and wife) to engage in sexual intercourse for a divine purpose.

To procreate and to Entertain.
Looking at the fundamental purposes of God for mankind to live according to his dictates, he blessed them, and the initial pronouncement God released on mankind was prophetic because it instilled a seed bearing or child bearing spirit into the anatomy of man.

As a result of that, any touch of, or intimate relationship between two opposing sexes must be for those two purposes, which is childbirth and pleasure, resulting in the ultimate replication of God’s image on earth.

Remember we are humans made in God’s image, unlike mammals who could “mate” anyhow for the main purpose of fast replenishment, we are expected to exhibit civility and serene life as human beings.

In an attempt to instill the expected discipline sexual life amongst male female relationship, God blessed the act and made it sacred, then gave the greenlight to be exhibited by “only” unionized couple.

The reason is thoughtful.
Sexual act is spiritual because it involved the soul of the partners, and once entangled with the other, there is an exchange of blood and fluid, the soul and spirit of the other, which is irretrievable hence the command to maintain same sexual partner throughout marriage life.

Subject to the above Godly reasons, and juxtapose with the mentality of man, sexual acts before marriage cannot be a panacea for healthy husband wife relationship.

Coming back to the struggle of breaking the jinx of sighting the genitals of the opposite sex before paying the dowries, the question that comes to mind is, why are women rather leading the struggle and not men (as normally the case)?

a. Assessing the Male Potency
Assessing the potency of the male counterpart prior to marriage relationship is the ultimate in premarital investigations because, the role of male organs in sexual act involves exertion of maximum energy from the mind and nerves.

The nerves is the main conduit of sourses of re-enforcement to the male organ. If the nerves and brain function is deficient, blood flow to the tissues of the male organ will retard leading to malfunctioning.

Male potency requires the attainment of maximum erection whilst maintaining a standard perpendicular to the body for not less than 10 to 15 minutes within ejaculation.

Secondly, the sperms swimming through the penile shaft must be strong, sharp and alive enough for conception (fertilization of an ova).

For conception to take place, 70% of sexual acts depended on male potency. What is planted by the penis, is absorbed by the uterus. If you plant thrash, thrash is received and nurtured.

b. Assessing the level of Strength.
Naturally, male potency doesn’t only required erection. The erection must be sustained. Maximum erection and its sustenance largely dwells on the constant blood flow to the penis. Psychologically, some goes off totally after some couple of thrusting.

This specific sexual menace is a hidden disdain that is causing a lot of discomfort to couples. The lifestyles of most men in this part of our world is a major factor. Excessive alcohol, fatty foods, lack of exercise to shed excess fat, and minimal consumption of fruits comes to mind.

The natural strength of every man in copulation should not be less than 10 to 15 minutes within ejaculation.

The level of strength of male counterpart are sometimes misconstrued to mean his natural capability to hammer the female counterpart into submission. Male potency against natural strength is parallel to each other, because male potency rides on the shoulder of the healthiness of the immune system, while his natural strength also rides on physical activities that he is engaged to.

C. Assessing the size of Manhood.
As argued by scientists, the sizes of male organs don’t necessarily matter, because substantial amount of excitement is attained through the art of making love, and not just the sexual intercourse.

Research has shown that most women prefer bigger dicks in order to maximize their excitement, meanwhile it is adversely not a full proof for attainment of utmost satisfaction. Clinically, the labia minora (the inner lips and canal of the vagina) is elastic, therefore rendering any size male organ a misnomer.

Naturally, every flaccid or pendulous (inactive) penis is 9.16 cm or 3.61 inches long.
Whilst the erected penis is 13.12 cm or 5.16 inches long.

In sharp contrast, or paradoxically, the vaginal canal, from the vulva to the cervix is 3 to 7 inches long depending on age variation.

However endowed a male counterpart could be, the female vaginal canal is crafted in a manner to absorb any size if well lubricated.

The capability of any man to utilize his male organ effectively, however the size is not the matter of pumping the balloon excessively, ejaculate and to and snore. It is one’s ability to massage the clitoris effectively and to grace the G spot (named after Stefan Graffensburg), which is affixed in the upper roof of the inside of the vulva or vagina.

It is directly located behind the clitoris, and the two are the major components of sexual excitement that takes women to the plateau level.
Interestingly, when the penis is too long, it may mistakenly hit the uterus causing unnecessary discomfort and pain to the female. A smaller male organ therefore, can well be utilized when it mastered how to engineer the ignition to the G spot and Almighty Clitoris to bring out the baby in them.

One other hidden factors that enthuses women to always behave clandestinely to attest to their male counterpart’s genital readiness for the task ahead is making sure the weapon is in good shape (circumcised penis).

A lot of women, based on their cultural antecedence and level of awareness, wouldn’t entertain an uncircumcised penis. It is simply an anathema.

On medical grounds too, it is unhealthy because it can easily absorb bacteria, only to be transfered to the female counterpart.

D. Quality Copulation.
Quality sex in the minds of some men means, to be able to penetrate her till she cries unabated. Just pin her down and open fire on her until she can no longer take it, “yerr I have done it”, he seem to say.

Someone may ask, what is quality sex? What is it with sex that deserved it to be quality?
Remember I have admonished you early on that, sexual intercourse is not the ability to thrust an erect penis into a vagina, pump for a while, ooze out your deposits, then drop dead and began snoring.

Quality sex in the minds of our women, start from an atmosphere of good demeanor between spouses, good communication from sunrise to arose the awareness, good rapport, good humor, and a lovely kiss before departure to the office.

A surprise call at noon to say hello with little humor to match. On the game proper, most men chose to behave like the he goat.

They become extremely aroused just by sighting the vagina and the opened legs, nothing should be a hindrance.

Human sexual relation differs from that of animals because, human beings have emotions that animals don’t have. Animals can mate anyhow, anywhere, anyone, whoever and whatever. Humans are God represented hence the expectations to do everything in relation to sex with dignity.

Quality sex is derived from the maximum understanding of the desires of the two, what makes us happy, and the channel to attain that happiness.

Quality sex sometimes is enraptured through foreplay, and foreplay largely dwells on ORAL SEX. Foreplay fundamentally deals with touches to sensitive parts of the body in soul communication.

Soul communication is the game whereby we chat smoothly whilst smooching each other.
Then the almighty oral sex which consists of sucking the penis (otherwise known as fellatio), and licking the vagina, (also known as cunnilingus). When well explored and exploited, no temptation can disrupt a relation in such environment.

Oral sex properly executed serves as the best form of sexual excitement and satisfaction than penile penetrative. Penis in vagina sex, isn’t an end to sexual excitement.

Acting upon the curiosity of men and women of marriage age, the demand to taste the Adams apple before it is hatched, leads to some of the above illustrations.

In conclusion, I would want to say that all the above concerns can only be successful under good hygienic condition.

Substantial aspect of the hygiene will be treated in the subsequent part.

By Sammy Ladzekpo.